


Stag

by cendri (crankyoldman), drakonlily



Series: Stag [5]
Category: Hannibal Lecter Series - All Media Types
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-04-26
Updated: 2013-06-10
Packaged: 2017-12-09 14:00:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/775010
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crankyoldman/pseuds/cendri, https://archiveofourown.org/users/drakonlily/pseuds/drakonlily
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There is violence beneath Graham's otherwise gentle demeanor. Hannibal wants nothing more than to see it come to the surface.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Session One

“Fear and anger are very similar emotions, don't you think so, Will?”

Graham clenched his jaw and focused on Lecter's cheek as he usually did when they talked. His shoulders were knotted and he immediately changed the subject, “I don't know if you think this is progress, Doctor.” 

"The only progress that matters is the progress that you feel. Does it not tire you when other people tell you how you should feel?"

Graham laughed a bit. Lecter had assumed upon meeting him that it would take a lot of work to gain his confidence, and quite a bit of psychotherapy to get him to learn his potential. But the pleasant surprise was that William Graham's potential only rested shallowly below the surface with nothing more than tenuous strings holding him on the side of the law and whatever misguided morality people devised to keep the monsters from coming out. 

"If I could tell _them_ to keep their thoughts to themselves, I would." It was a strange illness, empathy. Most people who spoke of the thoughts of others invading their minds would be schizophrenic. This was not the case with Graham. 

"But you wouldn't be you, Will. So let's not entertain such silly fantasies, hmm?"

Jack treated Graham as though he had an innocent purity about him while at the same time treating him as though he were a half tamed wolf on a leash. Lecter found himself agreeing with both statements, but not for the same reasons that Jack used. Graham had a purity; not one that suggested a lack of anything those others might find unsavory. Instead, Graham had a lack of certain complications. He could be certain that humanity was filled with violent, simple creatures that would eat or be eaten. Graham's only flaw really was that he refused to choose which category he fell under. It was no wonder that law enforcement wanted to weaponize so pure a source of judgment for their cause.

"But I do entertain that, from time to time. Wonder what a quiet mind is like." Graham never did lean back in the chair and relax. He had gotten close a few times, showing that he was starting to give Lecter a level of trust.

"I would imagine it's a lot like death."

"You and I both know that death is anything but quiet, Doctor."

He suppressed the smile that wanted to come out at Graham's statement. "Outside of our lines of work it is more often a whimper, and less of a bang."

"No one is a whimper, Doctor." Graham leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees. "I'd think you'd get that." He looked up, rare hardness and intensity in his face. For just a second, he looked Lecter right in the eye. "Everyone. Absolutely. Everyone. Wants to be violent. Maybe not all the time, maybe for a just reason. Or maybe they're just making up justice in their minds." The _that's what I do_ hung in the air unsaid between them.

Lecter fought to keep from smiling. Graham's flashes of honesty were enough to give someone chills. "All the more reason for my argument--only death is quiet. Your own death, that is."

Graham snorted and looked away again. "Even old age isn't quiet, Dr Lecter. When someone dies naturally, if they are able bodied? They run from it. They scream and wet themselves like frightened puppies. Even people in cancer wards, Dr. Lecter, they don't want to die. Death is beautiful, she's alluring even. But all of us run screaming from her." Graham couldn't seem to sit still and let someone else in his head anymore. He stood up and walked around the room. His calloused hands slid over perfectly dusted nick knacks. "Tell me, Doctor, why is it that you think your death will be quiet?"

"Hope, then. I don't imagine you'd want to end up like the corpses that seemingly talk to you, would you?" He rather liked watching Graham stalk about his office, touching things. He cataloged the things that Graham touched in his head, for later. "Or is that the end you feel your deserve?"

"Seemingly talk to me?" Graham clicked his tongue and picked up one of the small statues. It was a stag, weighty, made of brass. He bounced it softly in his hand as if judging it's impact if thrown. 

"Well, the dead can't _actually_ talk. Any reports of that have turned out to be schizophrenia or something similar." He probably should be more measured if he was going to corner Graham; after all, dangerous things tended to lash out when cornered. Lecter's desire to see how Graham lashed out overcame his typical self preservation. 

Graham set the stag down roughly and spun. “You think I don't know that?”

“Is that why you say 'I' when you walk a crime scene then?” Lecter remained seated.

“I say 'I' because... “ Graham took a deep breath and held it a moment before he let it out. 

Lecter stood up then. “Will, I think I have proven that I am not the one who is going to keep you from your work. I have already cleared you and you know it.” 

“Why?”

“Why not?”

Graham met Lecter's eyes for the second time. Lecter got the odd feeling of being exposed, it was exciting in its own way. He wondered how much Graham would find behind his eyes; if the act of silent protection would be returned. 

“Because that is how I see it happening.”

“So are you afraid of seeing yourself reflected in someone else's eyes?”

“No.” Graham looked at the stag again. “It's being their reflection that bothers me.”

“Because you would do something different? Or something better?”

Graham bristled. “I think we're done for the day.” 

“As you wish.”


	2. Session Two

“It appears that my Will is starting to lose track of himself.”

That earned a pause “'my' Will?”

Lecter smiled and took a sip from his wine glass. “We are friendly, are we not?”

The whiskey in Graham's glass was on the table about half gone. “That's still very possessive, Doctor Lecter.”

“Your health is important, Will. And you seem to be letting it get away from you.” Lecter leaned forward with an expression of concern across his face. 

Graham didn't appear to totally buy it. “My health or my sanity?”

“Both are part of your health, of course.”

“Are they?”

“Don't sass me, I'm your doctor.”

Graham tossed back the last of the whiskey and then leaned forward himself. “Well, that's not very friendly at all. Am I a case study? What is this Doctor Lecter?”

“This is your life, Will.”

Though he laughed, there wasn't any humor in Graham's face. “Then why do I feel like everyone else is trying to exercise ownership over it?”

“I'm not trying to own you.”

“You aren't?” Graham's clarity came through in a tone that left no room for argument. “In some way, Doctor, you want to own me in the same way that I...” he sucked in a breath and paused. 

When it became obvious that Graham wasn't going to continue, Lecter pressed. “The same way that you...?”

“Doesn't everyone, in some way, want to own something?”

“Of course. What do you want to own?”

Graham was quiet and considered for a while. He watched as Lecter stood up and crossed back to the liquor cabinet. “... stability?” Graham sounded unsure. 

Lecter's back was to Graham. He took the top off of the whiskey and poured another glass. He turned around and handed it to Graham before he spoke. “No one owns stability.”

Graham tipped the glass up slightly in thanks and took a sip before he sat it back down. “The semblance of it then. Perhaps? I don't know. I've never encountered it.” He then looked up at Lecter for a moment their eyes met. Graham looked away quickly without any lingering. It was as if he was trying to take a peek at something without really wanting to see the whole of it. “Do you trust anyone?” He asked a length.

Lecter smiled. “I trust you.”

“Maybe you shouldn't. I don't even trust me anymore.”

“I'll always trust you. The you that I see.” Lecter tilted his head up and watched Graham settle back into a more relaxed position in his chair. 

“What Will do you see? Because you and Jack do not see the same person. I don't think I see the same thing as either of you.” Graham swirled the whiskey glass.

“I see a brilliant man that is being held back.”

The glass got sat down and Graham stood up. He walked behind his chair and paced in front of the desk. “Holding me back is what keeps everyone around me safe.”

Lecter watched from his chair. “But it destroys you.”

Graham was looking at some of the heavy statues about the office. He picked up the stag again, it seemed to be his favorite one. “Isn't it better to destroy yourself than destroy others?” He put the stag down and walked up to Lecter's ladder. Slowly he ran a hand up it and inspected the wooden rungs. “That's the line we're always fed, isn't it? Self sacrifice?”

The wine glass made a soft tink as Lecter sat it down. He crossed the room silently and slowly reached out and touched Graham's shoulder. “Will, why don't you stop thinking of others? Why do you not think of yourself?”

Graham turned around. He pressed his back against the ladder and focused on Lecter's collarbone. “Because.”

Lecter's own hand gripped the ladder just above Graham's head as he took a slight step forward. He was close enough to smell that horrible aftershave. “Hardly an answer, Will.” 

The aftershave that Graham smelled was everything except cheap. His eyes flicked up and his hands gripped the sides of the railing. “It's all you're getting right now.” 

Lecter looked as though he was thinking about closing the distance between them. But instead he let go of the side of the ladder and took a half step back, just outside of Graham's personal space. “I suppose it will have to do then.”

**Author's Note:**

> This is going to be the AU offset of the Stag Collection, and the title work. The other stories can fit into here, but this is the only one that is going to focus primarily on Graham and Lecter's relationship. It's going to be a rather bumpy ride for them both.


End file.
